As I was not, as formerly, asleep in my carriage on deck, when we came within sight of the Irish shore, I saw, and hailed with delight, the beautiful bay of Dublin. The moment we landed, instead of putting myself out of humour, as before, with every thing at the Marine Hotel, I went directly to my friend, Lord Y———'s. I made my sortie from the hotel with so much extraordinary promptitude, that a slip-shod waiter was forced to pursue me, running or shuffling after me the whole length of the street, before he could overtake me, with a letter, which had been "waiting for my honour, at the hotel, since yesterday's Holyhead packet." This was a mistake, as the letter had never come or gone by any Holyhead packet; it was only a letter from Mr. M'Leod, to welcome me to Ireland again; and to tell me, that he had taken care to secure good well-aired lodgings for me: he added an account of what was going on at Glenthorn Castle. The extravagance of my lady had, by this time, reduced the family to great difficulties for ready-money, as they could neither sell nor mortgage any part of the Glenthorn estate, which was settled on the son. My poor foster-brother had, it seems, in vain, attempted to restrain the wasteful folly of his wife, and to persuade Johnny, the young heir apparent, to larn to be a jantleman: in vain Christy tried to prevail on his lordship, to refrain drinking whiskey preferably to claret; the youth pleaded both his father and mother's examples; and said, that as he was an only son, and his father had but a life-interest in the estate, he expected to be indulged; he repeated continually, "a short life and a merry one for me." Mr. M'Leod concluded this letter, by observing, "that far from its being a merry life, he never saw any thing more sad than the life this foolish boy led; and that Glenthorn Castle was so melancholy and disgusting a scene of waste, riot, and intemperance, that he could not bear to go there." I was grieved by this account, for the sake of my poor foster-brother; but it would have made a deeper impression upon me at any other time. I must own, that I forgot the letter, and all that it contained, as I knocked at Lord Y———'s door. Lord Y——— received me with open arms, and, with all the kindness of friendship, anticipated the questions I longed, yet feared, to ask.
"Cecilia Delamere is still unmarried——— Let these words be enough to content you for the present; all the rest is, I hope, in your own power."
In my power!———delightful thought! yet how distant that hope! For I was now, after all my labours, but just called to the bar; not yet likely, for years, to make a guinea, much less a fortune, by my profession. Many of the greatest of our lawyers have gone circuit, for ten or twelve years, before they made a hundred a year by their profession; and I was at this time four and thirty. I confessed to my Lord Y———, that these reflections alarmed and depressed me exceedingly: but he encouraged me by this answer——— "Persevere———deserve success, and trust the rest, not to fortune, but to your friends. It is not required of you to make ten thousand, or one thousand a year, at the bar, in any given time; but it is expected from you to give proofs, that you are capable of conquering the indolence of your disposition, or of your former habits. It is required from you, to give proofs of intellectual energy and ability. When you have convinced me, that you have the knowledge and assiduity that ought to succeed at the bar, I shall be certain, that only time is wanting to your actual acquisition of a fortune equal to what I ought to require for my fair friend and relation. When it comes to that point, it will, my dear sir, be time enough for me to say more. Till it comes to that point, I have promised Mrs. Delamere, that you will not even attempt to see her daughter. She blames me for having permitted Cecilia and you to see so much of each other, as you did in this house when you were last in Ireland. Perhaps I was imprudent, but your conduct has saved me from my own reproaches, and I fear no other. I end where I began, with 'Persevere———and may the success your perseverance deserves be your reward.' If I recollect right, these were nearly Miss Delamere's own words at parting with you."
In truth, I had not forgotten them; and I was so much excited by their repetition at this moment, and by my excellent friend's encouraging voice, that all difficulties, all dread of future labours or evils, vanished from my view. I went my first circuit, and made two guineas, and was content; for Lord Y——— was not disappointed: he told me it would, it must be so. But though I made no money, I obtained gradually, amongst my associates at the bar, the reputation for judgment and knowledge. Of this they could judge by my conversation, and by the remarks on the trials brought on before us. The elder counsel had been prepared in my favour, first by Mr. Devereux, and afterwards by my diligence in following their advice, during my studies in Dublin: they perceived that I had not lost my time in London, and that my mind was in my possession. They prophesied that, from the moment I began to be employed, I should rise rapidly at the bar. Opportunity, they told me, was now all that I wanted, and for that I must wait with patience. I waited with as much patience as I could. I had many friends; some among the judges, some among the more powerful class of men, the attorneys. Some of these friends made for me by Mr. Deveréux and Lady Geraldine; some by Lord Y———; some, may I say it, by myself. Yet the united and zealous endeavours, direct and indirect, of partisans more powerful and more numerous than mine, had failed to push on, or push up, several barristers, who were of much longer standing than myself. Indeed the attempts to bring them forward had, in some instances, been rather injurious than serviceable. The law is a profession in which patronage can do but little for any candidate. Every man, in his own business, will employ him whom he believes to have the most knowledge and ability. The utmost that even the highest patronage from the bench can do for a young barrister is, to give him an opportunity of distinguishing himself in preference to other competitors. This was all I hoped; and I was not deceived in this hope. It happened, that a cause of considerable moment, which had come on in our circuit, and to the whole course of which I had attended with great care, was removed, by an appeal, to the courts above, in Dublin. I fortunately, I should say, prudently, was in the habit of constant attendance at the courts: the counsel, who was engaged to manage this cause, was suddenly taken ill, and was disabled from proceeding. The judge called upon me; the attorneys, and the other counsel, were all agreed in wishing me to take up the business, for they knew I was prepared, and competent to the question. The next day the cause, which was then to be finally decided, came on. I sat up all night to look over my documents, and to make myself sure of my points. Ten years before this, if any one had prophesied this of me, how little could I have believed them!
The trial came on———I rose to speak. How fortunate it was for me, that I did not know my Lord Y——— was in the court. I am persuaded, that I could not have spoken three sentences, if he had caught my eye in the exordium of this my first harangue. Every man of sensibility———and no man without it can be an orator———every man of sensibility knows, that it is more difficult to speak in the presence of one anxious friend, for whose judgment we have a high opinion, than before a thousand auditors who are indifferent, and are strangers to us. Not conscious who was listening to me, whose eyes were upon me, whose heart was beating for me, I spoke with confidence and fluency, for I spoke on a subject, of which I had previously made myself completely master; and I was so full of the matter, that I thought not of the words. Perhaps this, and my having the right side of the question, were the causes of my success. I heard a buzz of thanks and applause round me. The decree was given in our favour. At this moment I recollected my bargain, and my debt to my good master, the special pleader. But all bargains, all debts, all special pleaders, vanished the next instant from my mind; for the crowd opened, Lord Y——— appeared before me, seized my hand, congratulated me actually with tears of joy, carried me away to his carriage, ordered the coachman to drive home———fast! fast!
"And now," said he to me, "I am satisfied. ———Your trial is over———successfully over——— You have convinced me of your powers and your perseverance. All the hopes of friendship are fulfilled: may all the hopes of love be accomplished. You have now my free and full approbation to address my ward and relation, Cecilia Delamere. You will have difficulties with her mother, perhaps; but none beyond what we good and great lawyers shall, I trust, be able to overrule. Mrs. Delamere knows, that, as I have an unsettled estate, and but one son, I have it in my power to provide for her daughter as if she were my own. It has always been my intention to do so: but, if you marry Miss Delamere, you will still find it necessary to pursue your profession diligently, to maintain her in her own rank and style of life; and now that you have felt the pleasures of successful exertion, you will consider this necessity as an additional blessing. From what I have heard this day, there can be no doubt, that, by pursuing your profession, you can secure, in a few years, not only ease and competence, but affluence and honours.——— Honours of your own earning.———How far superior to any hereditary title!"
The carriage stopped at Lord Y———'s door. My friend presented me to Cecilia, whom I saw this day for the first time since my return to Ireland. From this hour I date the commencement of my life of real happiness. How unlike that life of pleasure, to which so many give erroneously the name of happiness. Lord Y———, with his powerful influence, supported my cause with Mrs. Delamere, who was induced, though with an ill-grace, to give up her opposition.
"Cecilia," she said, "was now three and twenty, an age to judge for herself; and Lord Y———'s judgment was a great point in favour of Mr. O'Donoghoe, to be sure. And no doubt Mr. O'Donoghoe might make a fortune, since he had made a figure already at the bar. In short, she could not oppose the wishes of Lord Y———, and the affections of her daughter, since they were so fixed. But, after all," said Mrs. Delamere, "what a horrid thing it will be to hear my girl called Mrs. O'Donoghoe! Only conceive the sound of———Mrs. O'Donoghoe's carriage there!———Mrs. O'Donoghoe's carriage stops the way!"
"Your objection, my dear madam," replied Lord Y———, "is fully as well founded as that of a young lady of my acquaintance, who could not prevail on her delicacy to become the wife of a merchant of the name of Sheepshanks. He very wisely, or very gallantly, paid five hundred pounds to change his name. I make no doubt that your future son-in-law, Mrs. Delamere, will have no objection to take and bear the name and arms of Delamere; and I think I can answer for it, that a king's letter may be obtained, empowering him to do so. With this part of the business allow me to charge myself."
I spare the reader the protracted journal of a lover's hopes and fears. Cecilia, convinced by the exertions in which I had so long persevered, that my affection for her was not only sincere and ardent, but likely to be permanent, did not torture me by the vain delays of female coquetry. She believed, she said, that a man capable of conquering habitual indolence could not be of a feeble character; and she therefore consented, without hesitation, to-intrust her happiness to my care.
I hope my readers have, by this time, too favourable an opinion of me to suspect, that, in my joy, I forgot him who had been my steady friend in adversity. I wrote to M'Leod as soon as I knew my own happiness, and assured him, that it would be incomplete without his sympathy. I do not think there was at our wedding a face of more sincere, though sober joy, than M'Leod's. Cecilia and I have been now married above a twelvemonth, and she permits me to say, that she has never, for a moment, repented her choice. That I have not relapsed into my former habits, the judicious and benevolent reader will hence infer: and yet I have been in a situation to be spoiled; for I scarcely know a wish of my heart that remains ungratified, except the wish that my friend Mr. Devereux, and Lady Geraldine, should return from India, to see and partake of that happiness, of which they first prepared the foundation. They first wakened my dormant intellects, made me know that I had a heart, and that I was capable of forming a character for myself. The loss of my estate continued the course of my education, forced me to exert my own powers, and to rely upon myself. My passion for the amiable and charming Cecilia was afterwards motive sufficient, to urge me to perservering intellectual labour: fortunately my marriage has obliged me to continue my exertions, and the labours of my profession have made the pleasures of domestic life most delightful. The rich, says a philosophic moralist, are obliged to labour; if they would be healthy or happy; and they call this labour exercise.
Whether, if I were again a rich man, I should have sufficient voluntary exertion to take a due portion of mental and bodily exercise, I dare not pretend to determine, nor do I wish to be put to the trial. Desiring nothing in life but the continuance of the blessings I possess, I may here conclude my memoirs, by assuring my readers, that, after a full experience of most of what are called the pleasures of life, I would not accept of all the Glenthorn and Sherwood estates, to pass another year of such misery as I endured whilst I was "stretched on the rack of a too easy chair."
————————— The preceding Memoirs were just ready for publication, when I received the following letter:
To C. O'Donoghoe, Esq. "Honoured foster-brother, "Since the day I parted yees, nothing in life but misfortins has happened me, owing to my being overruled by my wife, who would be a lady, all I could say again it. But that's over, and there's no help; for all and all that ever she can say will do no good. The castle's burnt down all to the ground, and my Johnny's dead, and I wish I was dead in his place. The occasion of his death was owing to drink, which he fell into from getting too much money, and nothing to do——— and a snuff of a candle. When going to bed last night, a little in liquor, what does he do but takes the candle, and sticks it up against the head of his bed, as he used oftentimes to do, without detriment, in the cabin where he was reared against the mud-wall. But this was close to an ould window curtain, and a deal of ould wood in the bed, which was all in a smother, and he lying asleep after drinking, when he was ever hard to wake, and before he wakened at all, it appears the unfortunit cratur was smothered, and none heard a sentence of it, till the ceiling of my room, the blue bed-chamber, with a piece of the big wood cornice fell, and wakened me with terrible uproar, and all above and about me was flame and smoke, and I just took my wife on my back, and down the stairs with her, which did not give in till five minutes after, and she screeching, and all them relations she had screeching and running every one for themselves, and no thought in any to save any ting at all, but just what they could for themselves, and not a sarvant that was in his right rason. I got the ladder with a deal of difficulty, and up to Johnny's room, and there was a sight for me———he a corpse, and how even to get the corpse out of that, myself could not tell, for I was bewildered, and how they took me down, I don't well know. When I came to my sinses, I was lying on the ground in the court, and all confusion and screaming still, and the flames raging worse than ever. There's no use in describing all———the short of it is, there's nothing remaining of the castle, but the stones; and it's little I'd think o' that, if I could have Johnny back———such as he used to be in my good days; since he's gone I am no good. I write this to beg you, being married, of which I give you joy, to Miss Delamere, that is the hare at law, will take possession of all immediately, for I'm as good as dead, and will give no hindrance. I will go back to my forge, and, by the help of God, forget at my work what has passed, and as to my wife, she may go to her own kith and kin, if she will not abide by one, I shall not trouble her long. Mr. M'Leod is a good man, and will follow any directions you send, and may the blessing of God attind, and come to reign over us again, when you will find me, as heretofore,
"Your loyal foster-brother, "Christy Donoghoe."
Glenthorn Castle is now rebuilding; and, when it is finished, and when I return thither, I will, if it should be desired by the public, give a faithful account of my feelings. I flatter myself that I shall not relapse into indolence; my understanding has been cultivated ———I have acquired a taste for literature, and the example of Lord Y——— convinces me, that a man may at once be rich and noble, and active and happy.
